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Guybrush Threepwood

Our hero.  Not only can he hold his breath for ten minutes, swordfight with the best of 'em, stick large objects in his pants, and buckle some serious swash, he also has won the heart of the beautiful...

Elaine Marley

Our damsel in distress.  Actually, she's a lot better off than Guybrush...She loves him for his "incompetence," but don't tell him that.  Of course, Guybrush is the best choice available.  Well, it's either him or the Zombie Pirate....


Evil personified.  If it wasn't for his slight allergic reaction to rootbeer, or his propensity to be affected by voodoo curses, or that he smelled like a pair of underwear that somebody wiped their butt with, and then had their pet skunk spray, he just might be able to win the heart of Elaine.  But he has to do with the company of his walking undead buddies, or a few "live" recruits.  Like perhaps this man...

The Evil Pirate Bloodnose (Wally the Cartographer)

Poor Wally, the vicitim of some brainwashing (motivational "lectures"), and a slick advertising scam, run by LeChuck...sort of a cross between the Marquis de Sade and Tony Robbins.  You can't blame him, though.  I mean, " evil bloodthirsty pirate" is a lot more impressive than "cartographer" when you are talking to the barmaids while you are on shore leave.

Haggis McMutton, Edward Van Helgan, Cutthroat Bill

These guys form the only Barbershop "Quartet" in the Carribean.  Our hero, Guybrush, tried to join up, but was flatly rejected, based solely on the unfair fact that he cannot sing to save his life, but joined Guybrush's crew, anyhow.  If you find these three gentlemen's artistic expression not quite good enough for you, just downthe road at the theater, the travelling show "Speare" is playing.  It stars...

Slappy Cromwell (a.k.a. Rex Fortune, Adventure Seeker)

This fellow changed his name to Slappy Cromwell, based on the advice of his agent, saying his real name didn't have "star power."  Of course if he's dumb enough to take advice like that, he deserves to be in a one-man travelling Shakespeare festival dumbed down to cater to the primate patrons, who seem to be the only ones who enjoy it.


Guybrush's undead "friend."  He's always trying to get our hero to join his evil army, and together they can rule the world, but Guybrush, just feels that Murray is only using him for his legs, which is probably true.